Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Cancel your Credit Cards BEFORE you die

A family member placed a call to Citibank.
Here is the exchange:
Family Member: 'I am calling to tell you she died back in January.'
Citibank: 'The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply.'
Family Member: 'Maybe you should turn it over to collections.'
Citibank: 'Since it is two months past due, it already has been.'
Family Member: So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?'
Citibank: 'Either report her account to frauds division or report her to the credit bureau, maybe both!'
Family Member: 'Do you think God will be mad at her?'
Citibank: 'Excuse me?' Family Member: 'Did you just get what I was telling you - the part about her being dead?'
Citibank: 'Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor.'

Supervisor gets on the phone:
Family Member: 'I'm calling to tell you, she died back in January with a $0 balance.'
Citibank: 'The account was never closed and late fees and charges still apply.'
Family Member: 'You mean you want to collect from her estate?'
Citibank: (Stammer) 'Are you her lawyer?'
Family Member: 'No, I'm her great nephew.' (Lawyer info was given)
Citibank: 'Could you fax us a certificate of death?'
Family Member: 'Sure.' (Fax number was given)

After they get the fax:
Citibank: 'Our system just isn't setup for death. I don't know what more I can do to help.'
Family Member: 'Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep billing her. She won't care.'
Citibank: 'Well, the late fees and charges will still apply.'
(What is wrong with these people?!?)
Family Member: 'Would you like her new billing address?'
Citibank: 'That might help....'
Family Member: ' Odessa Memorial Cemetery , Highway 129, Plot Number 69.'
Citibank: 'Sir, that's a cemetery!'
Family Member: 'And what do you do with dead people on your planet???'
And you wondered why Citi Bank needed help from the Feds?


  1. I guess Citi employees feel dead working their jobs, so they figure the rest of the deceased are just like them and able to pay late fees...

  2. Heh! Stopsign, thanks for the chuckle this am.

    I can believe it, too...

  3. Don't let the IRS get wind of this...

  4. I have been through this with CitiBank when my sister died. This is no exaggeration.

    You have a new name here. I'll have to update my sidebar. Your gift starts to appear tomorrow ... thanks again!

  5. You can't make this stuff up....

  6. I like your new Blog-name. The story, too.

  7. Not surprised at all.
    Another idea would be to have a lawyer file for bankruptcy for you. After decades of charges have built up. Might be worth a couple hundo to spit in their eye from the grave.

  8. "Loner in the Night" has been included in the Sites To See for this week. I hope this helps to attract many new visitors to here.


  9. Hey Stopsign, you still around?

    I hope all is well :)

  10. Young lady, have you noticed it's been almost two months since we've heard from you. Say hello real soon ... OK?